Nose Enlargers: So Many Levels of Wrong

You know that creepy pump thing that small-chested women wear to increase their breast size? Well, in Japan, devices called HICO and HanaHana have been developed to help Japanese women make their noses “taller”, meaning with a more angular, Western bridge.

Both look like medieval torture devices of the face, which is exactly what they are. Squooshing your nose supposedly stretches the nose and builds cartilage. Yeah, right. At least it only costs about 800 yen=8 bucks.

Being half-Japanese and half-white, or any multiracial blend for that matter, you grow up in a genetic crap shoot where you don’t know the features you’ll get. I’ve run into half-Asian people who are tall, short, and everywhere in between. Skin color is literally anything goes. Some of us get black, coarse hair like mine, others are nearly blonde with hazel eyes. And finally, some get the great big honking Western nose and others get a small round Asian one.

I would LOVE to have a smaller, more Asian nose. I want the nice buttony nose that so many Japanese women already have!!!! My nose is fleshy, big, and stands out of my face, taking over. My big nose is probably the No. 1 reason you’ll never me out of the house without makeup on, it shines like a bulb and I look horrifying.

photo credit: Shayla Hason

photo credit: Shayla Hason

Guess it’s just proof that all women are dysmorphic–we always want something we don’t have already. And even those that are runway modelly beautiful are terrified of getting older and losing their hotness.

2 thoughts on “Nose Enlargers: So Many Levels of Wrong

  1. Enlarging your nose?! You’re so right; we always want what we don’t have. I have hooded eyelids and I want double eyelids. I made the mistake of using the Japanese/Korean eyelid tapes and it made my lids even more saggy than they were. I can’t believe they have this product!

    • So funny! I really want straight hair b/c I have wavy. I think hooded lids are beautiful!! You know, if they had a trick to make a nose look smaller (other than Photoshop LOL) I would employ it. Maybe the moral of the story is “Just be happy with what you’re given”?

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